i choose to remain anonymous, but i feel that there are people in this religion that may read these forums and i have something that i would like to say, as i am a former member. this is down to the small details that some readers may be unaware of. this is meant directly for church of the firstorn members for any who may be questioning their beliefs. hopefully this will help someone question even more and leave this religion.
my opening statement is to please question this religion.
never believe something just because someone taught you. never believe that just because their parents lived this way and their parents and their parents lived this way means that it is the true way of god. never believe that the king james version is the only bible. that is preached at this church and even the prophecies spoken in this church are spoken in old english. old english is not the language of god but has anyone ever questioned this in this church? people do not question because it is taught not to question. know that questioning is ok regardless of what your parents have taught you. do not be afraid to question yourself out of they call the faith in this religion. know that you are trapped in a religion full of holes some of you may wonder about, for example that you do not believe in doctors but you will go to an eye doctor and a mouth doctor and probably take cough drops because you think that it is not preventing a life threatening disease. you do not go to doctors because you think you will go to hell for trusting in man rather than god. do not believe that the difference in going to a doctor at a hospital is different than a dentist because dentists can not save your life, infact dentists save lives every day by preventing infection in your mouth that can lead to heart disease among many other life threatening diseases. please see the holes and please do not be afraid of the churches judgment on you. you can have a new life for yourself without the people who are harshly judging you if they shun you for your difference in beliefs. do research. look into history. see how the bible this church uses is not the one and only bible. learn that it is in fact a bible that has been copied several times. learn the background of this church. do not trust anyone. if everyone believed everything they were taught and it is wrong to believe different, then you may as well support terroism because they believe what they are doing is for god because they trust who taught them that religion all of their lives. learn for yourself. live your life. it is your life. there is a happier life to be lived. it's not the easy way out or being decieved as church of the firstborn members call it. you are not the only ones going to heaven because this religion preaches perfection, something unobtainable by human beings and dying in a bed at your house suffering does not gain you heaven. people will always die at their time whether they go to a doctor or not but atleast know that you don't have to die rotting and suffering in your homes in pain. takes the souls that have done so and the little children who have died as examples that this is not right. how many more examples do you need to see? how much pain do you know that your wife or child is in? when they could get relief. if you have faith in god, why can you not have faith in a hospital? why live a life based on fear of going to hell. it is constant torture. it is brainwashing. don't be a victim any longer. find what is right for you and save yourself and your families from a life of anguish.
see the holes. you have every right to ask as many questions as you want. your parents taught you not to question. everyone is afraid to ask because everyone is so afraid of going to hell. do you really want to live your life trying so hard to be perfect in this religion when a human can't be perfect? the god in this religion is very mean and vengeful and they preach that god is a jealous god. if it is wrong to be jealous, then god who is a god of love would not contradict himself and be jealous. read and learn for yourself what it really means. read and learn who god really is, not a god ready to wreak havoc on us, but a kind, loving, and gentle god. we were meant to be happy and take care of ourselves when needed, to be free of pain and it's not a sin. god has given humans knowledge. even if you were perfect would you be worthy of heaven and the pain jesus went through suffering on the cross? that's why so many people are at home scared, even suicidal in some cases in this religion, because a human can not obtain perfection. god already sent one child to die and to suffer. you do not have to suffer. you are loved by a god who is graceful, loving and kind. if that is hard for you to understand, it takes practice after years of brainwashing in this religion. god doesn't contradict himself. stop drawing lines on what's right and what's wrong because you can't make any sense of this religion. please stop making excuses for it and ignoring things because you have a feeling of security in this religion and know and love and trust the people and are too afraid to leave. chances are there are many people around you at your church who sneak to the doctor and secretly believe differently but they are afraid to tell others and continue to go to church because they are afraid of the harsh judgment they will recieve if they speak up. i have heard of this happening. help yourselves and eachother and stand up for your confusion and your beliefs. please don't place it in the back of your minds. please open your eyes. you are a victim and you may be afraid, but you can find your way to a peaceful life full of answers to your questions. god heals, but he heals in hospitals too. if you pray for someone in a hospital do you give the credit for healing to a doctor or to god? do you believe in your prayers for those who have been healed in hospitals? do you know that there are physicians in the bible? do more research on what the religion teaches about calling for the elders when sick. a true test of faith in this religion would require one to not use their hands and sit on the ground and pray for food in their mouths, everything would come to them. we as humans have hands for use to take care of ourselves and eachother. we are all here to help and support one another in this world and that's why some of us are doctors, dentists, and many other forms of support to one another. just as your midwives deliver your children, do you credit them or god for the safe delivery? going to a hospital doesn't mean that you have to credit the doctor over god. you do not have to live this way. deep down you may be very frightened and unsure of where you stand with god, as i was in this religion, and you may only feel able to gain heaven when attempting to live perfect and then have a hard time to forgiving yourself when you make a mistake. when this happens, people sometimes give up for a while entirely. ask every question and prove it yourself in every way that you can if this religion is correct. live your life and don't let the people, your family and elders in this religion brainwash you another day. do not be blinded. a blind person cannot see anything, fully seeing is knowing why you believe what you believe with proof and facts, not living blindly drawing lines and taking guesses because you trust what people say and don't see and learn and know for yourself. the simple fact is, that you are loved unconditionally by god and that is all you ever need to know, which in turn gives you the ability to live in a safe environment with the care you need to keep from pain and suffering and it takes away all fear. some people are afraid to go to a doctor because they have never been which in turn creates a faith issue. are you afraid they will find something wrong with you and are you afraid of doctors and medicine? again, it's all about trusting in god. don't let the fear of that stop you from going if you secretly feel that it is ok. if you take herbs, it is the same thing. everything is the same from chicken soup to medication. it is the act in which you use it, which is to ease pain. god is still the healer. food and drink ease the pain, as medicine eases the pain. god has given us knowledge and supply on the earth. this is not the easy way out as the church may call it. infact it is harder to comprehend that god loves you unconditionally after being taught to fear god in that religion. fearing god does not mean to be afraid of god. don't be another parent to teach your children to live in fear and suffering. lean toward the love in the bible in whatever bible you choose to read. it speaks of love and of grace continually. do not lean toward the fearful things that scare you to stay in this religion because you are afraid that if you leave the church and that you will commit blasphemy and go to hell. leaving this religion is not blasphemy like they teach. and god is not only tied to this church. god is much much bigger than to only be tied to one small religion. they teach the road is wide to destruction and narrow to heaven. that doesn's mean that because your church is small and the world outside of your church is bigger that you are the only ones going to heaven. going to a doctor is not going to keep anyone out of heaven, among numerous other teachings in this church. do not depend soley on what you have heard by these elders and church members and your parents teachings if they have raised you this way. praise god because you love him for his unconditional love and his grace for you. save yourself and your family by asking as many questions as you can. learn for yourself. how do you know your church wasn't a branch off of another church? do you see the pattern? the leaders of this church have been in a power struggle for decades. that is why there are so many branches. you see the control and the power struggles here over the teachings and traditions that cause so many split off churches in this religion? don't do you really know that your church is the right one anyway? 100 years ago was the church you are in a branch off of another one because the leaders of your church back then were battling with another church of the firstborn? do you really know what you are dealing with by putting your trust in these people? just because one of the branched off churches believes in doctors does not mean they are an off church. it just means that there are a lot of contradictions with this church, period, and it causes much confusion with the members. do you really know? for yourself? how long will you trust these people with your lives? ask yourselves and the people who taught you many questions. when it is illegal in all states to have children at home without a licensed midwife are you going to break the law when the bible you read says to obey the law? if breaking the law is wrong yet people do it anyway for this religion, it creates a contradiction. god does not contradict. only misunderstanding people create contradictions and draw lines. save your family from pain. save yourself. stop contradicting your beliefs. questioning yourself out of this faith is the best thing you could ever do. it doesn't matter that it's generation to generation. all that means is people trusting the people before them without solid answers. are you going to continue to let them scare you and live an impossible perfect life or are you ready to start asking questions? what is it going to hurt to start asking them and yourselves? judgment from them? that you were told never to question and to have faith? faith in what, them? because if you are thinking it's having faith in god for what an elder at this church tells you, or another church member, that is not the answer. people also talk of wolves in sheeps clothing. are you one hundred percent sure that these people are not wolves?they can't even give you the answers and only use one bible because of their tradition. it is time to forget what you have heard and learn for yourself and pray for god's guidance for the absolute truth. does it bother you that they call your church a cult? why? people in this religion are against that remark and come on this website and start a conversation to speak up for their church and it dead ends. let that be a sign that you have not a leg to stand on with your words. where is the proof other than stories of healings? obviously god heals and he heals many people throughout the world, not just in one small religion who have been so isolated from the world they can not see anything other than their small church. that is very blind. are you willing to possibly watch your wives and children suffer? the elders, the church members and your parents owe you answers as they have taught you this way from birth mostly likely. they owe you answers and you owe yourself the research and the answers so that you can take part in the rest of god's world. and remember how much of the bible is metaphorical and how many times it has been translated. can you really know everything from one version and a copy? you may be able to get enough out of it but this church takes it so far out of contest that it needs to be read for what it says, not what you have been taught that each scripture means. do you realize that the king james version is a version? define version. there are many. can you really go word by word and know it's the exact wording from jesus time? why are people speaking prophecies in old english? if you are willing to believe the numerous stories and beliefs in this religion, is it because you are afraid of anything new because this is all you have every known? are you afraid of the judgment of church members? do you serve god out of fear of hell? would it feel better to serve him with praise knowing he loves you unconditionally and knows you are an imperfect human? do you think if you served him in that manner that that means people can do whatever they want and be bad people and still go to heaven? that is not what that means because if you serve god by praise out of love then you will ultimately be full of love and joy that you will not desire to do terrible things. you will live a life of praise. as the end of the king james version says, grace be with you all. what does that mean? that grace will be with you all if you are perfect and die at home with faith in god for saving your life or living out your salvation? absolutely not. are you afraid you will be led astray? as they call it. how do you know that the people before you were not led astray into a religion full of suffering death fear and contradiction? do you serve god in this religion because you feel like one of the lucky ones in this world that was chosen in this small circle of people? who told you that? and what did they know? because your church goes by everything in the bible and other churches don't preach the hard stuff? as they call it. because your church baptizes people in a certain way that is different from other churches? do you see the isolation created here by one bible version that is difficult to read in old english when there are modern english bibles available and generation after generation teachings and church doctrine, which is church tradition? and it has been said in this church that it is wrong to look into other bibles and into history. who is to decide that for you? the bible is about history. it holds pieces of history, and not all of them. if you want to live your life not knowing anything other than what someone told you and trusting your church members, do you realize the jepoardy you are putting you and your family in? be the one who teaches your family in the right way by standing up for your right and taking them out of that religion and talking to other people and doing research and reading anything you can get your hands and get yourself out into the real world. it's not a scary place. it's god's world and he is everywhere. there is more to god than not going to doctors and women not cutting their hair. on cutting hair, read and learn what this is actually teaching. many women across the nation in these churches are secretly cutting their hair or wishing they could and for men having short hair, who is to say how short it should be? this section of the bible is not saying what this religion teaches and is an embarrasment for many women. the men in the church go places and appear as the rest of the world but the women on the other hand, want to look nice and stylish, but their hair causes them to stand out whether they fully realize or not. at times they receive compliments but for some, that is the most comfort they receive. they feel that it is a glory. this needs reading into as it is very sad to me to have witnessed cases of attractive women from what this religion calls the world, anyone not baptized into to, fixed up with stylish cut hair in the presence of church members and the church men have a hard time not looking. the women notice this and many say they could be as pretty as some of these women if they could cut their hair or wear more makeup. you owe it to your wives and daughters to learn this for yourself and save them the embarassment of appearing and feeling out of place and having low self esteem and not allowing them to do the things women enjoy and take care of themselves. i have known this to be true for several women in this religion. you deserve answers. you deserve proof other than having an elder say to have faith in the religion and in their one version of the bible which they tell you is the only one because they believe it came directly from jesus and was handed down to them. how do you know that? if you don't put your faith in man when it comes to doctors, then why would you put your faith in a man at your church? are you going to believe everything they teach you? because you believe an elder in this religion is chosen child only to preside in this faith? prove it. find your own facts. it is very important that you not be blinded by these people. i have been there and i did not leave until i realized my questions could not be answered. i did not fail. i did not take the easy way out. satan did not paint a pretty picture for me. i was not led astray. i am not blinded. i am not any of those things that the church teaches happens to people who leave the religion. i did not commit blasphemy. i am not isolated anymore. i can see. it is not the way you have to live and if you choose to do so, you are only denying your rights as an individual and trusting those around you. pray for the answers and ask all of the questions you have the right to ask. don't be treated as child to these people and trust them when you are an adult. god never said you can not ask. you have every right to know.
former member

Hello anonymous I am commenting from your 2008 post not sure if your even around but to say I don't care to be anonymous my name is Nancy McGee I was a member I go from time to time less then more I was raised in this church by my parents as well as my grandparents, this church is a cult as I really like what you have touched on sooo many topics on my spiritual wellness, some are so strict they have horrible hygiene. Dr um lets touch that subject again dentist optical hearing aid that's a dr you hypocrites they need to watch where they point the trigger is always facing them judge not least you be, my home church is in Bakersfield California the church known as a whore church hum lets see who Jesus forgave ppl get off your high throne your not God I sure would not want to stand near you at the pearly gates. And this preaching my God do you have to tell us your life story up there Just preach Not stand there and testify. The topic for me is cult is I've suggested outreach in the community to have more visit our church but was turned down by Bob Harmon my cousin and Roy BALLARD my Uncle both are deceased. We are and seems to me we are an introvert church sadly. I agree give praise to God not man for the healing it was God that gave so many gifts of knowledge yes call elders call members but you jack asses that won't take your child in and they die and you say it's Gods will well maybe so because God saw you could not keep his child safe from you!!!!!! See I'm transparent I will speak my mind clearly. Oh and let's not forget in the bible don't know where Jesus calls for a physician oh ppl guess ya did not read that in the bible, you twist Gods word and you think you know what Jesus and God meant um hello wake up call remember after Jesus prayed and 1 deciple asked when will we we know the end is near look it up idiots so don't tell me I'm bound to someone and reject me cause I'm married again 4 times rant over atm I'm sure I'll be back PS this church was a split from Quakers uh duh oh and I'm 53 not a child but spiritually old enough to know your a hypocritical ppl and child killers
Nancy McGee
Bakersfield California

Hi Nancy,

If you are interested I need some support from others who have left this church. Please contact me if you receive this message.

Kesti Rose

I left the church ten years ago and I just now feel like I may be in a position to help someone trying to leave