Sheriff David Smith
St. Francis County Sheriffs Office

Dear David,

I hope this email finds you well and that you have now fully recovered from your accident last year.

David, it is with a very heavy heart that I write this email. I need your help. As you know our family is Jewish. We have allowed our daughter [L.D.] to attend services and events at the Chabad here since she was 14 years old. [L.D.] turned 18 on April 14th... so for 4 years we thought that this was a safe haven for our teenager.

We have found out some very disturbing facts about them since we stopped [L.D.] from going there several months ago.

1 - There is underage drinking at the Chabad House at 521 Main St. North.

Every Friday evening there are drunk drivers as well as underage teenagers drinking. They "toast" shots of Vodka over and over and over again... and since they think a 13 year old is an adult (by religious law) they ignore the fact that our US laws take precedent. They allowed this with our daughter!!!

2 - Chabad has employees who are sexual predators.

Sadly I have found that this also happened to our daughter!!! We trusted them to protect her in a religious environment. Instead we find that she has been abused there. In spite of supposedly teaching the strictest abstinence, I have proof via emails to my daughter from at least one of their employees who was 23 had sex with her when she was 17. We suspect that there was at least one more employee who sexually abused her there.

I am finding from others that this is by design, they lure young girls, get them to move to Brooklyn, the young women then have no means of support so they marry their men and produce 10 - 12+ children... therefore propagating their "movement".

3 - Chabad preys on young people in general.

They brainwash the young to join them, convince them that at 18 they MUST leave their homes, schools, and friends to attend Yeshiva (religious school) in Crown Heights (Brooklyn) NY.

Again sadly this morning when we went to wake our [L.D.] for school, she was missing. Your detective found her several hours later with some unknown family in Crown Heights, NY....supposedly safe???!!! She left her family, a new job at Publix, a job at Coopers Restaurant, she was to graduate from High School with honors in 3 weeks and she had been accepted as a scholarship student at UCF for the 2007 Fall Session, and perhaps the biggest sadness her little brother who adores her.....all now left behind without notice or any regard. This is not normal.

Needless to say Mike and I and our entire family is devastated.

The local Chabad must be investigated. The Rabbi (Kurinsky) here in helped plan to get my daughter to leave home "the minute" she turned 18. It is brainwash, it is mental control, it is contributing etc etc. This plan began long before she was 18, he brainwashed her and convinced her that she was not a Jew... and until she converted "their way" and went to "their schools" she would never be a Jew.

Sadly, our [L.D.] "bought into it"... and now she is gone... the truth is, the way their closeted community works we may never see her again.

Therefore, we want to rigorously pursue anything we can to stop these people from being able to front these illegal activities in our community, and prevent this from happening to another family.

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SEND THIS MAIL TO THE STATE ATTORNEY, ALCOHOL BUREAUS OR ANY OTHER AGENCIES WHO MAY NEED TO INVESTIGATE.

Thank you ahead of time for your support to stop the illegal activity at the local Chabad.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2010 12:58AM by rrmoderator.

Mrs. Rubin,

I do not understand your grief as I cannot understand such a difficult experience, which thank G-d I have not experienced. Yet I wish you may reestablish your relationship with your daughter as what it should be and that your daughter be allowed the tools to make her own decisions and understand clearly what she would be giving up not going to college and making the most of her potential. If some of the allegations here are true they are condemnable in every aspect. I say "if" not because they do not sound beliveable, but because it is appropriate to give the other side the benefit of doubt.

Nonetheless, Chabad is not a cult. A Chabad is one of tenths of Jewish Orthodox Chassidic movements, this one particularly dating some 170 years back.

I personally know, and have known for many and many years, several Chabad communities around the world (though not in the USA), people who have joined these communities, and those who have left them. In Israel, there is an entire city of Chabad followers, named Kfar Chabad.

Since the passing of their last Rabbi, known as the Lubavich Rebbe (the original name of this Chassiduth is Chassiduth Lubavich, Chabad, even to this date, is, if you may, a nickname) there have been several problems with portions of this movement, concerning the belief that spread among part of the followers that the Rebbe was the Messaiah, with alll that is implicated with that belief (the idea that he is returning any day now to solve all our problems, etc.).

Notwithstanding those problems, there is a serious and clearly established leadership that abides to the general laws of Orthodox Judaism. What that means, for your purpose, is that if it would be found that Chabad, as a whole, is what your post described it to be, all the thousands of members of this movement would find themselves outside this very strict society, which for them is completely unthinkable. This in theory of course, because practically, the post is not an accurate description of Chabad as a whole.

If you wish to help your daughter, the best thing in my opinion is for you to contact a serious and well respected Chabad Rabbi and surely he will help you. I will give you the closest example possible:

Some years ago. at a certain point in her life, my Mom, which is not a young lady anymore, decided to follow the Jewish laws more strictly, and this bothered my Father. She was attending the local Chabad community, and decided to ask the Rabbi there what to do. As you may imagine, Jewish law strongly pushes for Jews to practice Orthodox Judaism. Yet, the Rabbi told her that the wholeness of the family was more important and that she should give up whatever bothers my father. This was a Chabad rabbi.

If you do not know who are those Rabbi's within Chabad that could help you, perhaps I could help you with a short list of Rabbis with which to speak. I can asure you Orthodox Judaism is against people leaving their families as you described. Let alone lure young people and abuse them sexually, if someone does that they should be in jail or under treatment and surveillance.

Best of luck.

jaim:

I strongly disagree with your opinions about Chabad and the Lubavitch movement.

I have received repeated and very serious complaints from Jewish families bad and former members about Chabad.

The organization has become quite controversial and many Jewish leaders and scholars feel it has become a personality-driven "cult."

See [www.culteducation.com]

I would not recommend going to Chabad rabbis to solve a problem with Chabad, but rather seek outside help, e.g. family counseling from a licensed professional, a local rabbi outside Chabad etc.

Since the Rabbi Schneerson's death there has been no new "rebbe" to lead the Lubavitch, which is a very major change for the sect.

The apology that there are factions that support the messianic cult-like view of Schneerson, while others do not is often repeated. But I see this more as spin-control to keep the money coming in through fund-raising efforts and avoid problems with recruitment.

Much of the money Chabad raises comes from Jews outside of the movement. And its recruitment programs are likewise targeted towards other Jews.

I have received complaints of family estrangements, abrubt educational and career changes along with claims of "brainwashing" from affected families.

I would not recommend the Chabad Lubavitch to anyone under any circumstances.

Ms. D.:

If you suspect criminal activity you should go immediately to the local police in your area and report it.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2010 12:35AM by rrmoderator.

Mr. Moderator,

First of al I thank you for allowing my post inspite of strongly disagreeing with it.

Second, obviously if Mrs. Rubin suspects there has been sexual abuse and underage drinking she should report to the police, please do not understand my post as saying the opposite.

I confess that i have no contact with Chabad USA, and so perhaps the situation there is more problematic than what I imagine or am told.

I will agree with what you wrote: "The organization has become quite controversial and many Jewish leaders and scholars feel it has become a personality-driven "cult."

From my knowledge this is totally true. I would add, that also the Orthodox community has showed concern, and some treat Chabad as an outsider, which is serious, considering this is a close society.

Also what you wrote: "Since the Rabbi Schneerson's death there has been no new "rebbe" to lead the Lubavitch, which is a very major change for the sect. ". That is completely accurate, and had not happened in more than 150 years.

Yet what you write about the "messianic problem" being a spin control apology is not accurate. Chabad has grown substantially the last 30 years under a policy initiated by the last Rebbe of reaching out to Jews everywhere. Thus, quite differently from all other Chassidic movements, the number of new members, meaning, Jews who come from non Orthodox families, grew and became an important group within the sect.

The core of the Chabad movement, that is, families and communities that have been part of the movement for many generations, in most cases, are completely against the Messianic idea (not the concept itself, I refer to the idea that the last Rebbe was the Messaiah). This core clearly understands the problem, and has tried to establish their view as mainstream, while at the same time trying to avoid a separation within the movement. That is obviously not easy.

I can tell you matter of factly, that the larger communities in Europe and South America are non Messianic, the problem being felt principally in Israel and the USA. In Israel, this problem is not treated slightly.

Nonetheless, what you write is serious. Please allow me a couple of weeks to investigate with my friends within Chabad what is their take of the situation. Also, I will check what is the recommendation of the rabinnical leaders outside Chabad and hopefuly something can be effectively done to change the situation you describe.

jaim:

Please understand that the complaints and problems I have described regarding Chabad are well-known within the organized Jewish community and long-standing.

If Chabad wishes to make it clear that it does not regard Schneerson as the "messiah"--they should do so by making a clear and concise public statement. Appointing a new rebbe would also be positive step, following the historical tradition of the sect.

I have received complaints about the Chabad in Israel too.

I assure you everything in my post is true and accurate. We have been to the police, the FBI, Senators, Conservative Rabbis, Chabad Rabbis... no one can help us get our daughter back because she is now 18.

Now I understand that the Chabad family she is with in NY is now trying to get her out of the country.

We have no idea where our daughter is. The people of Chabad know but they are NOT TALKING. They are all denying any knowledge of our daughter's whereabouts.

We just want her home so she can graduate from high school and go on to lead a NORMAL conservative or even orthodox life... BUT THRU THE CONVENTIONAL JEWISH BRANCHES NOT CHABAD.

Our daughter sent us an email telling how wonderful Chabad is and how happy she is there... etc etc etc..... The way the mail was written I believe as her mother, that SHE DID NOT WRITE IT.... someone was coaching her. Her email sounded like a recruiting letter for the GLORIFICATION OF CHABAD.

[b:2388d2a998]I feel all Jewish parents all over the world should band together and get them OUT OF OUR COMMUNITIES AND ESP COLLEGE CAMPUSES. They are preying on vunerable, young CHILDREN and sadly as the movement becomes larger and larger and larger.... obviously their PLAN IS WORKING.[/b:2388d2a998]



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2010 12:57AM by rrmoderator.

Ms. D.:

I am very sorry to learn of your situation.

I have received similar complaints from other parents about Chabad

The Chabad has isolated some of its recruits and estranged them from their families as a direct result of its agressive proselytizing practices.

I have had complaints from Orthodox, Conservative and Reform Jewish families.

Once parentls seriously questioned the influence Chabad had over their children, it appears that its leaders encouraged less communication between the recruit and his or her family, which ultimately lead to increasing isolation and eventual estrangement.

Some new recruits have also been encouraged to move to Israel, where the Chabad has communities near Tel Aviv and Safed. There they may become even further isolated within what can be seen as a relatively controlled environment.

The recruitment and retention practices of Chabad are in many ways similar to groups called "cults" such as ISKCON, the Unification Church and Scientology.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2010 12:34AM by rrmoderator.

Mrs. Rubin,

If I understand correctly what you have written, this is terrible. So as to clarify things beyond doubt: I understand that you do not know where your daughter is and have no real contact with her.

This being the case, I wish to try and help, using my relationship with people within Chadab. Obviously, in order to help I would need more information.

Nonetheless, if you believe I could try to help, I think it would be better to use the forum moderator or other professionals from RRI as those through which to do this. Therefore my suggestion is that if you want to try this channel, contact them and then I will let them know what my resources are and have them decide if they think I could be of any help.

I say this since they apparently have had much experience with situations such as this one, while I am an individual with good influential friends at Chabad (outside the USA) and wish to help. I would prefer that they decide if my help is something you should try out.

I hope you reunite with your daughter soon.

THIS CORRESPONDENCE TO LAW ENFORCEMENT IS EVERYTHING i HAVE.
I KNOW NOTHING MORE ABOUT THE CIRCUMSTANCES SURROUNDING THE DISAPPEARANCE OF MY DAUGHTER.

Lt. Mike Hartsell
cc: Sheriff Shoar, Agent Matthews FBI

Dear Mike,

I left you two telephone messages yesterday..

1) I need to get [L.D.] into the system officially as a Missing Person. That will help me get help from the NY/NJ authorities. We now believe that she may be in Morristown, NJ or the Morristown Township. There is a Chabad Lubavitch School there. We believe that Chabad is moving her due to us putting pressure on them, and as I stated in my telephone message may plan to send her to Safed, Israel very soon to a Chabad Seminary there. She may have been or is in Monsey, NY and Crown Heights, NY.

The NY/NJ authorities state that I must get her name "officially in the system". Then if you will contact them they will pursue an investigation into her EXACT whereabouts.

The Cult intervention clinic of New York Jewish and Family Services has stated to me that they believe that the Chabad has perhaps hundreds of Jewish girls 18-20 that are there without their families permission..... just like Leah!!!

2) I also need to know if we can "Baker Act" her, getting her forcibly removed by the authorities and put in a court ordered psychiatric evaluation. I have friends/relative who are Psychiatrists and a Judge respectively that I could get help from. Leah has been a "cutter" and also has threatened suicide in the past. She has been in unsuccessful psychotherapy twice. ALL OF THIS SINCE HER ASSOCIATION WITH CHABAD. Can you help me with this????

We are now told that none of her friends, teachers etc knew of her plan which seems very strange to me. One girl came forward and told me that [L.D.] was meeting her boyfriend in NY, and she would be gone for a very long time, this same girl told us that the boyfriend purchased the plane ticket. This boy, Velvel Kutsy, is a Chabad employee, and a Chabad member.

Here is what a moderator from another Anti-Cult agency responded to me about isolating and estrangement of children by the Chabad.

Moderator


Joined: 17 Jun 2002
Posts: 2058
Location: Jersey City
Posted: 04-28-2007 04:49 AM Post subject:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ms. D.:

I am very sorry to learn of your situation.

I have received similar complaints from other parents about Chabad

The Chabad has isolated some of its recruits and estranged them from their families as a direct result of its aggressive proselytizing practices.

I have had complaints from Orthodox, Conservative and Reform Jewish families.

[b:ba2ce02963]Once parents seriously questioned the influence Chabad had over their children, it appears that its leaders encouraged less communication between the recruit and his or her family, which ultimately lead to increasing isolation and eventual estrangement. [/b:ba2ce02963]

Some new recruits have also been encouraged to move to Israel, where the Chabad has communities near Tel Aviv and Safed. There they may become even further isolated within what can be seen as a relatively controlled environment.

The recruitment and retention practices of Chabad are in many ways similar to groups called "cults" such as ISKCON, the Unification Church and Scientology.

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT IS HAPPENING TO OUR DAUGHTER, I BELIEVE WITH ALL MY HEART THAT THEY TARGETED HER AS BEING VULNERABLE AND COERCED HER VIA KUTSY !!!!!!!

3) Is there a way to arrest the Chabad Rabbi (Kurinsky) for obstructing our investigation? I believe that he is behind getting her to NY along with Kutsy and getting her a place to stay.... I feel he knows much more than he is telling us... We believe that he:

a) lied about not knowing where Leah is
b) also knew that his relative picked [L.D.] up from the airport in NY

4) As we discussed, below is a copy of the email I sent to Sheriff Shoar (EMAIL #1) the day that Leah disappeared and the email attachment to that mail (EMAIL #2) showing the Chabad employee Alan "Velvel" Kutsy admittedly drunk while supervising the little children.

5)( EMAIL #3) below is re: the sex between [L.D.] and this same employee, Alan "Velvel" Kutsy who we now believe was 25 years old and [L.D.] was 17 when the sex took place. This I understand from my attorney is a 2nd Degree Felony. He is also the "boyfriend" that bought the airline ticket for her to get to New York.

6) FINALLY EMAIL #4, This is mail from Velvel Kutsy, first to me, then my husband's response to his mail to me, next Kutsy's response to my husband justifying his actions. It is clear by my husbands demands that the Chabad and Kutsy leave our [L.D.] alone.... at this time she was still 17. He admits in this letter that there was absolutely nothing wrong with the underage drinking and defends himself and the Chabad..... DENIES THE SEX WITH HER... this is all b.s.

I spoke with Joel Bollante on Friday about watching the Chabad House at 521 A1A North for DWI/DUI drivers leaving Chabad on Friday evenings and for underage drinking taking place there. I am looking for anything that we can legally use to get them in trouble so that they will cooperate and help us find our daughter!!!

PLEASE HELP US!!!! I FEEL WE ARE RAPIDLY RUNNING OUT OF TIME TO GET HER BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ATTACHMENTS:
__________________________________________________________________________________________
EMAIL #1

Sheriff David Shoar
St. Johns County Sheriffs Office

Dear David,

I hope this email finds you well and that you have now fully recovered from your accident last year.

David, it is with a very heavy heart that I write this email. I need your help. As you know our family is Jewish. We have allowed our daughter [L.D.] to attend services and events at the Chabad Ponte Vedra since she was 14 years old. [L.D.] turned 18 on April 14th... so for 4 years we thought that this was a safe haven for our teenager.

We have found out some very disturbing facts about them since we stopped Leah from going there several months ago.

1 - There is underage drinking at the Chabad House at 521 A1A North.

Every Friday evening there are drunk drivers as well as underage teenagers drinking. They "toast" shots of Vodka over and over and over again... and since they think a 13 year old is an adult (by religious law) they ignore the fact that our US laws take precedent. They allowed this with our daughter!!!

2 - Chabad has employees who are sexual predators.

Sadly I have found that this also happened to our daughter!!! We trusted them to protect her in a religious environment. Instead we find that she has been abused there. In spite of supposedly teaching the strictest abstinence, I have proof via emails to my daughter from at least one of their employees who was 23 had sex with her when she was 17. We suspect that there was at least one more employee who sexually abused her there.

I am finding from others that this is by design, they lure young girls, get them to move to Brooklyn, the young women then have no means of support so they marry their men and produce 10 - 12+ children... therefore propagating their "movement".

3 - Chabad preys on young people in general.

They brainwash the young to join them, convince them that at 18 they MUST leave their homes, schools, and friends to attend Yeshiva (religious school) in Crown Heights (Brooklyn) NY.

Again sadly this morning when we went to wake our Leah for school, she was missing. Your detective found her several hours later with some unknown family in Crown Heights, NY....supposedly safe???!!! She left her family, a new job at Publix, a job at the Bridge Restaurant, she was to graduate from Nease in 3 weeks and she had been accepted as a scholarship student at UCF for the 2007 Fall Session, and perhaps the biggest sadness her little brother who adores her.....all now left behind without notice or any regard. This is not normal.

Needless to say Mike and I and our entire family is devastated.

The Ponte Vedra Chabad must be investigated. The Rabbi (Kurinsky) here in Ponte Vedra helped plan to get my daughter to leave home "the minute" she turned 18. It is brainwash, it is mental control, it is contributing etc etc. This plan began long before she was 18, he brainwashed her and convinced her that she was not a Jew... and until she converted "their way" and went to "their schools" she would never be a Jew.

Sadly, our Leah "bought into it"... and now she is gone... the truth is, the way their closeted community works we may never see her again.

Therefore, we want to rigorously pursue anything we can to stop these people from being able to front these illegal activities in our community, and prevent this from happening to another family.

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SEND THIS MAIL TO THE STATE ATTORNEY, ALCOHOL BUREAUS OR ANY OTHER AGENCIES WHO MAY NEED TO INVESTIGATE.

(The following is just one email from a Chabad member watching the little children while he was admittedly drunk... there are many others.)

Thank you ahead of time for your support to stop the illegal activity at the Ponte Vedra Chabad.

Sincerely,

{K.]


EMAIL #2

Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2007 00:37:06 -0400

Here are some pics of me teaching sunday school in Tallahassee, and [b:ba2ce02963]being drunk off my @$$ on Purim while recklessly dancing around with little kids, and on tables with drunk rabbis[/b:ba2ce02963][/size:ba2ce02963], lol. Not to mention i was also the dj for the evening so u can see me at the spin tables...that's was before i found out where the rabbi was hiding the black label though. Baruch Hashem for playlists.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

EMAIL #3

From: [L.D.]

Sent: Monday, March 26, 2007 7:31 AM
To: Velvel Kutsy
Subject: Re:

lol you're hilarious.....
i can't believe you sent me that :-P you're probably right about that whole thing but i just wanted to make sure you knew what was going on.....im really sorry i didnt get to call you back last night....my dad was screwing around for like 30 mins and i was pretty tired so i just went ahead and went to sleep[b:ba2ce02963]....i'll take a pregnancy test this week to see what the dealio is by the way....no reason to keep stressing about it.....hope all is well sweetness....i'll email you again soon....xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo[/b:ba2ce02963]

-[L.D.]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
EMAIL #4

-----------------
Forwarded Message:
Date: 3/28/2007 4:26:01 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time

Dear Mr. D.,

I have no desire to debate with you, nor tell you how to raise your daughter. My previous e-mail was aimed solely to clear up false rumors, and express my disapproval with your family’s unwarranted actions against me, via Chabad of Florida.

I will not sit hear and try to advocate underage drinking, that is between you and Nochum. But I can’t say I understand why you take American law to heart with such fervor. What is really the difference between a 17 year old girl, and one that will be 18 in two weeks. Just because the law decided a certain age, why follow it blindly? Every other high school kid is getting drunk and doing who knows what with whomever. What about when the law was 18 for drinking, or in places where it is even lower? I don’t think there is any serious crime to allow a supervised minor to make L’ Chaim and say blessings and become more receptive to spirituality. I don’t believe that your daughter ever came back from Chabad stumbling through the door, or with slurred speech.

However I also believe that as a father you have every right to prohibit it, and I think that perhaps Nochum should take more care to enforce your wishes if he has not already done so. I also would agree with you that you can read and question anything you want. But I don’t think it’s respectful and it is not a proper way to treat somebody approaching adulthood. It simply creates an environment where your daughter will not trust you, and will take greater stakes to hide things from you. What you do not have the right to do however, is to go on a campaign against me without having all the facts, and without first contacting me before including my name in several unpleasant contexts.

Leah advised me to open up a savings account. I thought it was a good idea and it took me over a month to send the check. When I did, I sent her a confirmation. This is not a joint bank account. I was simply showing that I appreciated her advice and I had finally come through on it.

Sex and pregnancy were hardly a topic of discussion. I don’t believe that it is a crime, that it came up sometimes. But in general I take care to steer the conversation from such matters. The subject of birth control was strictly in the context of her menstrual cycle without a second party involvement. It was just one e-mail, trust me it’s not my favorite subject in the world either J .

Obviously you don’t know much about me. I did not start becoming more observant until I was 17… a senior in high school. I grew up in NY as a normal American boy. And my situation at home growing up sounds pretty exactly like what Leah is going through now. My father sounds very similar to you, and my mother was never in the picture. Any advice that I may have given lay has been solely from my own experiences. After high school my father made me go to a military college when I really wanted to go to Yeshiva University. A year later I went to Yeshiva University, followed by a year in Yeshiva, followed by a year in a half in Israel, followed by my living and working in Crown Heights, followed by my coming down to work in Tallahassee. Throughout this whole journey I never saw a penny from my family, except maybe on a birthday, and only because I was stranded in Israel and they were worried they’d never see me again. They may have been right if it wasn’t for the missiles falling on my city.

You obviously have very strong objections with the Jewish way of life. Perhaps you have some valid concerns with Chabad in Ponte Vedra, but you should know that Chabad’s main mission is to bring, G-dliness to the whole world by revealing it in every single Jew. Perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to support your daughter and try to learn something from her as well. Judging by your e-mail you main argument is not against your daughter, me, or Chabad but against Judaism itself, and you have no faith in your daughter that she wants to do the right thing by your family, she is the only one that knows how, and she will do the right thing despite all the opposition. Also since when is a person faith or morals decided by what they wear, that your so worried that your daughter is going to wear these types of clothes or another. Don’t be so religious when it suits you.

I know that [L.D.] has not been with any men recently not because I spent a lot of time with her but because I trust her. I took a liking to [L.D.], and she was very open with me about her past and her dreams for the future. I realized that given the current situation with my job position and [L.D.]’s age that no real relationship could be consummated any time soon. I wanted to keep communications open so that I could continue to support her spiritual journey, and that is all that I have been doing. I know that [L.D.] is committed to living a moral lifestyle, and I also no that nothing happened in Gainesville because I personally met the people that [L.D.] was staying by when they came for the Shabbos meal, and I was not too concerned.

Your e-mail was very comprehensive, so I hope I touched on all the important points in my response. Please feel free to continue writing me, also if you have any more questions about me before you make any more false assumptions about my upbringing or my morality. If we can I would really appreciate if we can stop including Nochum and Rabbi Korf in all our correspondence. The Rebbe taught that no Jew is too small, and I cannot bare the amount of time that is wasted reading lengthy e-mails when there is no more that needs to be said. Looking forward to hearing back. Please keep in mind that I am not working against you. I’m just a person.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [M.K.]
Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2007 1:59 PM

Dear Velvel,

I will answer your e-mail that you sent to me addressed to my wife.

I beg to differ with your reasoning about the entire situation. There are more than a few points that we disagree on. First and foremost, I as [L.D.]'s Father have the right and moreover an obligation to watch over her and have the absolute right to read anything that I care to and question without any interference from her friends or the Chabad! [L.D.] is a minor!!!!! Or do you not realize that?

Next, the Chabad has done a pretty lousy job in directing [L.D.] away from illegal things such as alcohol despite my strong feelings and instructions to the contrary to the Rabbi. In my world, underage drinking in the name of religion is totally unacceptable. My non Orthodox morality is much more restrictive than yours. There is no place in my world for any man to discuss birth control, sex, or pregnancy with a 17 year old girl. So regardless whether you were making a joke, which I seriously doubt, or not, it is just as wrong. [L.D.]'s sex life is absolutely none of your business or concern.

Third, the Chabad seems to believe that everything that [L.D.] states is fact. You have absolutely no feel or knowledge if [L.D.] is telling people what is really happening or if everything that she is saying is completely false. Yet, you are making assumptions about her and her family anyway, which you have absolutely no basis for. Not only you, but the Rabbi in Ponte Vedra Chabad.

Fourth, [L.D.]'s conduct during her weekend in Gainsville last month was completely unacceptable both legally as well as morally. And how do you know whether [L.D.] has had sex recently? Have you been with her for every minute over the last few months? Or is this just more of your empty conversation that is contained in your email?

Fifth, as far as the Crown Heights apartment is concerned, you have absolutely no business involved in any way with a minor child leaving home. There are laws about that. And what business do you have being involved with a bank account with [L.D.]? There is much more to all of this than you are saying.

Sixth, you have no idea of my relationship with my daughter. And you are completely wrong. If Leah were to be in New York by herself, she would be in more trouble than you could ever imagine. My judgement and only my judgement will be used in her welfare; not that of the Chabad. [L.D.] did not grow up an Orthodox Jewish girl. Leah knows a different life that you do not. You can not put her backwards and keep her captive there. She has absolutely no idea just what the Brooklyn Orthodox Jewish life entails. It might be ok for a little while, but it would not be long until she was back in her American girl clothes!!

Seventh, you would have been lucky to have been brought up with the amount of love and caring that Leah has had in her life to now. You are writing e-mails from the perspective of a young man who has not seen the real world and has absolutely no experience in the matters of mature life. What do you know about [L.D.]'s experiences in Conservative Judaism? What do you know about how much direct involvement I have had in her life both in the Jewish Center, Camp Ramah, etc. etc. etc.

How dare you or for that matter Nachum tell me how to raise a child!!! My wife has banned [L.D.] from the Chabad in Ponte Vedra and I couldn't agree with her decision more. It has been nothing but problems for Leah since she started attending. I have stood by watching [L.D.]'s life go downhill as she has gotten more connected with the Chabad. There was absolutely no disatisfaction with Conservative Judaism on [L.D.]'s part (she even wanted steak at Ruth Chris restaurant for her Bat Mitzvah dinner over my objections) until there suddenly appeared Chabad people who tried to change her prospective and push her to become Chabad Jewish even pushing her that she had to convert again over the objections of her very learned Rabbi at the Jewish Center.

I have raised a normal American Girl for almost 18 years and that is the direction that her entire family wants her to stay in. If you succeed in changing [L.D.], she will lose her entire family. In fact, I am not sure that we will remain Jewish should [L.D.] go off the deep end because of Chabad. And finally, what business does a 23 year old man have with a 17 year old girl?

Now what else do you want to debate with me?

[M.D.]


From: Velvel Kutsy
Tuesday, March 27, 2007 11:08 PM
Cc: 'Rabbi Schneur Z

Dear Mrs. [D.],

I wanted to take the opportunity to talk to you personally in order to clarify matters for the both of us. First and foremost I must make it clear that I never laid a finger on your daughter. With the exception of us bumping into each other a few times and perhaps one hug, which was more than enough for my conscience to bare. I’m sure you have your reasons for which you feel that your daughter is not trustworthy, but I know that I have never given you any reason to also think that way about me. Forgive me for taking the initiative to contact you, but with all due respect I must express my feelings about how you have gone about handling what you seem to think is a situation. Hacking into your daughter’s e-mail, and reading an e-mail taken out of context, is by no means definitive evidence. And Jewish law, which you obviously seem to be so concerned about, would require you to first verify that the information is true, and secondly to try to handle the issue with the offender privately with as little people knowing about it as possible. If that were to not work then you would be allowed to pursue the involvement of a third party, such as a Rav, boss, parents, etc. The Torah obligates us in any situation to stress discretion, and sensitivity to people’s feelings, and reputation. The conversation was never about pregnancy, but rather about the birth control pills that Leah was prescribed by her doctor for medical reasons. I was told that you know about that. Her talking about pregnancy was her being silly and could only be taken seriously by somebody other than the person who that e-mail was sent to. For example, someone who invades someone else’s privacy and takes things out of the context in which they were said. Somebody, who knows for a fact however, that [L.D.] has not had relations with anybody, anytime recently, would understand the e-mail with its sarcastic implications. Especially when it was written to somebody would never do such a thing, and observes the Jewish law, of not touching women at all until after marriage. Also, the apartment in Crown Heights had nothing to do with me. [L.D.] just wanted to get away for the summer, because of the situation at home. I don’t want to get involved in you personal affairs because it isn’t really my business. But based on the preposterous accusation that you made against me and vehemently publicized, I could see how any objective person would support Leah’s decision to distance her from the madness as much as possible.

Just a few week ago You, [L.D.], and I all spoke on the phone together, we’ve met in person on more than one occasion. I very disturbed that you think that you can go say and do whatever you want, without even having the decency to approach me with the matter. I can go blabbing my mouth off too about how I’m going to press charges on account of slander and libel, etc. As a matter of fact the only person, as of this point that has done anything obscene, and reprimandable…is you. I’m not threatening, or have any intention except to come to a peaceable agreement. I am an honorable person, and Chabad is an honorable institution. And if you feel that I am interfering with the proper rearing of your beloved daughter, you should’ve addressed me first. Either way I have agreed to cut off all communication with her, indefinitely. And I really hope that we can settle this and move on with our lives. I’m going to forward my e-mail to all the members involved, however I think that all future communications should remain private. Truthfully you’ve made a lot of people feel very uncomfortable, including myself, and I’m not saying that I want to continue talking to you if I don’t have to. As far as I am concerned there is nothing left to say except for you apology, which I will gladly do without.

I’d like to conclude, that I’ve done nothing but try to influence your daughter in a positive way, according to standards that I myself abide by. I’m very unsettled with your behavior, but I understand that I am subjective, so that’s all I’ll say about that. Please, please, please, put this NON-ISSUE to rest. AND BE NICE TO YOUR DAUGHTER!!!!

Feel free to contact me if you feel there is anything more I can do to put your mind at ease.

Sincerely,

Velvel



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2010 12:57AM by rrmoderator.