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"My personal experience with a cult
When I was 17 I got involved with a cult, I spent 3 years living according to it’s practice and in the end, managed to get myself out of it, it fact it was the freedom of choice and tom that helped me, I remember sitting around toms little table and laughing my head off at the way his mind works and as he explained to me how to think for my self, it took another 4 -5 years to manage to get some handle back on my self again as I did a lot of mental damage to my self in those 3 years.
It all started back in 1996, when a older male in my life, who I looked up to at that point advised that I do this program, he said it was really good and it would do me good and I did not have the money at the time but I borrowed it from my farther to do it, it was like $500.
I remember at the time when I said to my farther can I borrow the money he was like what for?
I was like a program in personal development,
He was like, Pay me $500 and I can tell you some pretty interesting things about life...that’s dad..
I did this program, and in all it was a good program, a part from a bit of smoke and mirrors which at the time I did not pay attention to, but in retrospection was the beginning of their prograganda.
Example in the program is they block out all the lights in the room and then say, we are going to introduce you to some “light beings”, so were all standing in this room in the dark like 80 people, and supposed to be seeing “light beings”, now…if you are not laughing you should be….
It’s like the emperors new clothes….you know? he has none, there were no bloody light beings…I did not see any, and I pretty sure neither did anybody else, but some claimed they did, by this point in the program most of us were so high that I think they could have said anything and we would have said, yes it is real.
What this program was, was a careful mishmash of real psychological tools mixed with brain washing information to make us feel like that we have been “awakened”, it fact it was called “the awakening”.
What you did was when you went on this program, all you eat for 5 days was raw fruit and vegetables, and you then got involved in working through issues of the past and you are taught methods of gestalt therapy, which involved screaming and beating big black mats, for like 20 minutes at a time.
You did like group meditations and guided meditation also, also you did emotional yoga.
What I have learned is that most people are so suppressed an so unhappy, so badly parented and bullyed by life that they all have issues one way or another, if you give them specific ingredients they will feel better, example, if you eat just raw fruit and veg for 5 days you will notice a measurable shift in awareness, if you couple this with meditation it will get even stronger, if you mix this with meditation, yoga, and say rebirthing, after 5 days you will feel like a new person, there’s no trick to it, it’s like all you are doing is clearing something that has not been cleared in a long time.
In all the support team was very good and supportive and it really went off as a program, you came out of it feeling just like you had been given a new lease on life, but you also came out of it brainwashed, example one of the things they taught was how you can use “white light” to protect things and create things, and make things work in your favor, example, if someone is going on a trip you can white light them and they will be safe, at the time when this was said I put up my hand and asked what if someone is destined to die, she said that if you white light them they will live.
I did this program, and what they did was got your mailing address and send you out every month a news letter that was advertising more programs, like a step ladder, you could not do specific programs unless you had done others, this mail was full of testimonies of people saying how incredible these programs are.
So the next program was called “the final step”, it was like $2000, and a week long, I borrow the money to do this one as well, and went long, except this one was a DDDDOOOZZZYYYY!!!
We got stuck on this bus, with black out windows, and taken to this place that we did not even know were it was, there were 80 people and we spent the week being demoralized by the support team and leader, the whole program was design to make you uncomfortable, like being in a concentration camp, example when we got of the bus we all had to line up, and the loving support team we new on the first program had turned into a group a cool interrogators.
To start off They demonstrated what they called a “genital rub” were everyone gets in a line like a train and puts there hands between eachothers legs and rub’s each others genitals, it went for like 20 seconds, up front.. I did not touch anybody’s private parts and would not let anybody touch mine, everybody was laughing shouting as everybody felt stupid, the sport team commented that we all had genitals in funny places, like on our thighs, this was like the biggest shock to my system if you can imagine, and everybody else’s, and was just ridiculous.
For that whole week, we were denied sleep, and given little food and had the living hell picked out of us, people broke, got in fights, man, it was just like all the trimmings and BS that people carry on with just fell away, example we went to bed at like 3am in the mourning and got up at 5am, we did this forced 2 Km run then had to swim in freezing water for 20 minutes naked, which I nearly cracked for 6 days, then we did all these other stupid things like stand around in the sun all day and get picked on by the support team.
We were given like 2 minutes to eat, and it was just silly, 10 minutes to all go to the toilet, you imagine.. 80 people trying to get through 2 toilets in 10 minutes.
One such test we had to make our own dinner, but we could not enter the tent to get the food to do it, so you got 80 cold starving people standing around trying to figure out this riddle, which was not really a riddle as much as it was a way to screw with our heads.
In the end, we cracked and just walked into the tent took the food opened it with our bare hands, and ate it, which we were later made to feel like savages for doing it.
So by the end of seven days of this we were jaded, but it ends with this huge celebration by the support team as, if they say “you made it’, through this horrible ordeal with loaded dice and all ...you made it through.
You know. I still get so angry when I think about that program to this day, because the whole time, I was made to feel, like I had some how created this whole thing, that somehow, the reason why I was cold hungry and getting picked on is because I had issue’s, that I needed to look at.
In truth I went on that program to find my self, and that did not happen.
Now some of you are wondering, man, what were you thinking?
Why did you just not run away?
Well it did cross my mind, but there is a catch, I had been running away all my life, believe me… I can pull the pin on just about anything, I ran away from schools, I ran away from my family, I ran away from just about anything, so I said to my self …I am going to break a pattern hear, so I stuck it out.
Also some other interesting things happen on this program, I walked over about 20 feet of red hot Coles and did not get burned, that was very strange, they had a bucket of cold water at the end of the walk and I put my feet in the water after I had crossed the Coles and both hissed but I did not get burned.
So I got off this program, I had been through a lot, including having one of my friends who I thought was a close friend turned on me on the program and gave me a serve, which gutted me, leaving me feeling just guilty and terrible about my self.
So I finish this program and in truth I learnt some things, but what I learnt was kind of counter productive so it was kind of like a double edged sword.
So anyway, I year pass’s and I had been seeing some of the councilors from these programs and they had all done the program called “personal mastery”, which was like $5000, now, some of you guys must be wondering am I a *** for punishment, and the answer is, well, I figure that all programs could not be like that one, and I was right, well sort of.
I did this program because other people that ran this cult were very, very perceptive and seemed to always know what was going on in side of me, and this is really very interesting, and this is what I have learnt, psychic ability , emotional intelligence, empathic ability, can be learned, but the person that employs it may not be very evolved, that is you can sence were someone is at, and effectively use it against them , to weaken and manipulate them, and these guys had this ability in fact I develop it my self over a period of 15 months with a lot of work, till eventually I could see right through them, or spot them at there own game.
I find this feeling type of person in other circles as well , it’s a dynamic personality that is very intuitive, the intuition is one aspect of spiritual development, and arises spontaneously when the human has done sufficient work on them selves, usually emotional work, it is very different from intellect, example, if I sat one of these guys in front of tom, you would witness an intuitive and logic stand off that would rival any Jedi sword play, they are very different.
So any way, I borrowed the money again $5000 and went and did this program called “personal Mastery” it went for 12 months and was , kind of like the final step. But after doing final step everything seemed, well kind of easy.
We all had to become vegans, drink 2 liters of fruit and vegetable juice every day, run 10 Km and read like 3 books a week and they could be any size from 500 pages to 100 pages.
How it worked was, we got so many books and we only had a set time to read them, then we had to send them off to other people, who only had a set time to read them, then we had to write a assignments about each book, which was then sent to the head office by a due date, if the assignments were late or did not arrive, or something happened you had to redo the book and assignments , guess what happened?
Everybody’s assignments went missing and it was just a big shozmozel,so after about 2 months you were redoing assignments left right and center, and made to feel like you had some how brought this on your self.
Once a week we had a group meeting were we would raise issues with each and exchange books, these meetings were not with out there physical fights and screaming matches that lasted for like hours at a time.
One of the things we learned on final step was to be honest about how we feel about each other, this blinding honesty is effective only to a point, once the ego gets involved then all you get is nit picking, and people can say some really horrible stuff, which causes an escalation, so once you get into that, well, it’s a classic flame war, except your in the same room with each other and your shouting your heads off.
What we had been given was a system to operate with out any guidance, Example, giving people the go ahead to be perfectly honest with each other at every moment of every day, is not always a good thing, you become an expert at spotting other peoples stuff, but you also cope a far bit of flack yourself, then end result is this, you become very good at snippering people and very good at ducking and weaving your self, you end up at the end of the week, angry about all these things that have been said to you, and you have no doubt upset a few people your self.
My day consisted of getting up at 4am in the mourning, running 10km then drinking to liter of juice then going to work, working all day, getting home and reading a book till 11pm at night, then getting up at 4am again and doing it all again, then every 2 to 3 weeks we would go away to head office and spend the week end “sorting out our issues” which I’m sure were created by this process, that is, normal people don’t live like this, or do this…period.
This involved hours of catharsis, and a another form of theirs was they put up boxing bags and you were given a base ball bat and you were to verbalize your issues whilst beating this boxing bag ,we would do this all day, as like 25 people would just rebound of each others and just be screaming an shouting all day, end the end you actually became used to it, people like took it in turns.
I found I became hyper sensitive, to other people about me, and more and more ingrained in this life style, if I missed a day’s run, I would make sure I made it up the next day, some mornings I ran 30 KM, 70KM a week on a vegan diet and holding down a job is a path to sickness, we were told to do this and if we did not then the group would pick on us.
What I did was I took what they gave me, and threw my self into it, I did this because I thought that they had the answer, they new more then me.
The more digging into these people I did the more I found things which led me to believe that they are grossly misguided and even a little “crazy”, baring in mind some of you may consider me crazy but to give you some idea of who I was at 17 you need to understand were I had come from, I had been expose to drugs at a very young age, crime and had pretty well raised myself, example I took myself to school from grade one, and was often left at home with my older brothers who, one of them was dealing in drugs and theft and the other was always doing his own things, up until this cult I was a lead singer in rock band, thought nothing of doing the most silly things in fact my friends and I prided our self on our stupidity ,so in my world, at that time all I had known was craziness, you know?
When my mum left home when I was 5 and I had been raised by my brothers who rarely called me by my name, there used insults when the referred to me, I was pretty screwed up.
I left home at 15 and was really a loose canon, I was often suicidal, and really over the top, now… if you put me in front of these people these days, I would just pull them to bits, and see them for what they are, but back then I saw through different eyes.
So any way, after about 18 months of “personal mastery”, and witnessing the strangest things I have ever seen, so much so that to this day, it is very hard to surprise me… I left to start my life again, I spent a couple of months in Brisbane, and then moved to Melbourne with a suet case, and $100 in my pocket and spent the first night sleeping in the middle of Melbourne under a tree with the fox’s, by the way Melbourne is a great city, and it’s been good to me.
I started again, I met my partner who loves me dearly and I love her, we have a little daughter, and I have managed to find balance, just…. I can hold down a job and have finally figured out how to just let life give me what I need…. you know?
I don’t push the envelope as much anymore, I still have dreams about being in the cult and the message is always the same, it’s spelt out to me in metaphorical examples.
With this cult, the leader had taken a whole lot of psychological tools from a experienced and qualified psychologist and reworked an revamped them with her own crazy twist.
So in short the tools that you were given, worked as best to be expected but she was crazy, it turns out through people that managed to get them selves out of this cult that she thinks she is part of the “galactic federation”, only those that get very close to her know this, she also thinks we are all going to go to the forth dimension when the coming earth changes happen.
One of the greatest things about this cult is some of the things were so right, I mean so right and most so very wrong, example, one of the things she taught was that as parents evolve so do there children because the child take on the sins of the parents, now her last child was, I guess you could say special, example at the age of 4 he would ask why you feel the way you feel, example, he would say to a lady, why is it you laugh when all you want to do it cry?, now I don’t know if this was just a case of all of us projecting this onto him, maybe he was just conditioned by his mother.
He would say some strange things, like he would say to his mother, I have been watching you, meaning before he came into a physical body, he had been watching her from the astral plane, but at saying all of this, when I stepped back and looked at my life it was a mess, and the leader was, well, had issues that lead me to believe she had double standards.
In retrospection I think these people are really just lost, and one of my old friends is still in there, and we don’t talk anymore, but just to give you an idea of the sort of strange behavior that goes on when you hang out with these people.
His partner was pregnant, she had to have a C section, they are both vegan, which being vegan and having a baby is not always a good idea, anyway, the baby is born but it’s heart stops beating, because it is too week, so the baby is brought back to life by a doctor but will not eat and is under weight, so the leader takes my mates partner drown stairs and makes her eat, all these cream buns and chocolate cakes, you know fattening foods, they go back up stairs and the baby had put on 2kgs,
Intent and ritual?
I don’t know
But I tell you, if she had been eating properly, and not living on fruit juice, and involved with this cult she may have had a normal birth with a healthy robust baby.
The leader was well known for doing these little miracles, but really they don’t take anything way from her crazy behavior.
They also think they are changing the world by creating a conscious “slip stream”, this psychic transference, that is, if they work through all there issues, then when the changes come it will be easier for the earth to go through the transition to the fourth dimension.
There were actually groups of people that when they left the cult they meet up to put there lives back together, I lived with one of these people when I left the cult, as the leader had run off with her boy friend, or her boy friend had left to live with the leader at head office, it was at this time that she told me some things which really made things clearer to me, that I had long suspected.
Through this all my family just stood back ,and called me crazy, I think they still think I am a little strange, my sister says I used to be so funny and happy go lucky, I don’t know, I think I am o.k.,
To give you more examples of this cults activities` they used to hold you under black mats and all sit on you till you completely lost your mind because you could not breathe, they said it used to bring up everybody’s issues, and well, it did, being suffocated and crushed has that effect on you, I hated watching this, and it was all in the name of progress.
So you must be wondering who they are?
Go to [www.universalknowledge.com.au
By their deeds shall you know them.