From: darin_selby@hotmail.com

This is the actual letter that I sent to the Twelve Tribes at the beginning of 2002, and afterward is their response. I have a short commentary on my own personal feelings about what Yoneq and Ha-emeq (the leaders) had to write back to me - so I feel that all of what is contained in this e-mail is important to me to have published together. This is so that when folks take the time to read it, they will get a clearer view of BOTH sides, and not just my one-sided view.


I suggest that you print this out so that it can be taken with you to read and contemplate it in "bite size" amounts. If you have any questions, please contact me. Thank you. Sincerely, Darin Selby


>Letter written to the Twelve Tribes back in the beginning of 2002:
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>First of all, let it be known that my overall intention in sending out this letter is to help "build and to plant". There are presently, though, some daily practices and focused directions that I have decided I can no longer participate in. In this letter I raise these concerns.
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>I originally sent this letter to the Plymouth, MA community. This was one of the many different community locations that I've lived in over the past two years. After a month of waiting, I have yet to receive a reply to my questions.
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>The people that I have encountered at all of the Twelve Tribes communities have always extended to me the "hospitality of Abraham". Why did I decide to leave then? Some have said to me that it was wrong for me to go; that I had an "obligation" to everyone to stay. I had made an oath that was for life, and I should stick to it or else I will become like Judas and betray Jesus and his true church. (Mt5:12)
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>Week after week went by, and I wondered to myself, "What is necessary for a people to do on a daily level to be truly bonded to each other, and what is just an unprofitable (and sometimes stifling) ritual?" Because of this uncertainty, I would feel like a "bird in a cage", so to speak, when participating in all of the daily and weekly mandatory rote and ritual. I wondered why I never really felt like I fit in to what was going on around me - even though I made the attempt to cooperate with the process of daily life in the Twelve Tribes. Sometimes I felt so alone amidst the crowds of pure, well-meaning people.
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>It seemed to me that my "human voice"; my dreams and aspirations, had been "silenced" the moment I "gave up" my life. I was now in God's army - so I need to "come when I'm called, and I go where I'm sent" - setting all of my own specialties and aspirations aside to become another "worker bee" in the "hive". This mainly involved rushing around and doing things for others - taking orders and ready to change direction at a moment's notice. That's the job of a worker bee. For so long I was very happy to do this. I was given hope from the very beginning that at least some of my ideas eventually could be considered and utilized by the Twelve Tribes. I saw the "fertile soil" in the little ones; how they could grow up and benefit from all of the exciting visions that I would read in the ITN, and hear people talk about wanting to do.someday. It captivated me to want to stick around and to be able to share in their development.
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>Over and over again I would mention ideas and concepts; learning to go through my "cover" to possibly have things considered. Week after week passed by where almost everything that I asked to be considered was put on the "back burner". I would read the ITN about all of the wonderful ideas and visions of others...also to be put on the "shelf" - to be considered at some "later date". I was many times told,
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>"Well, maybe someday those ideas of yours will happen. Just keep praying about it at the Menchot".
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>Creative talents lie dormant in most while those who are "ready to go" are utilized to their fullest. The investment of time and energy needed to make certain people "blossom" are clearly seen and understood. Yet, it is so much easier to get someone who is already reliable and "fills the niche", so to speak. The other person is really fine just the way he is. You can relax around him, and when the right time comes, he can quote some scripture verse that's convincing & pleasing to the ears. He's always nice and tidy to look at. He is a fine "worker bee" for the "hive". It's been explained to him that if he's obedient and does what he's told, he'll have eternal life when he dies!
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>So, back to work he goes...as he tries not to think about his potential creative side that has no outlet to flourish and to be considered weekly with the others around him. In essence he's told, "There's so much to do, we really don't have time for that kind of stuff right now. Your 'shepherds' know what's best for you, and they're very good at making all of the decisions concerning your life now, and what you should be doing every minute of the day. If you have to go anywhere or do anything, make sure that you get permission first through your 'cover'. I'm sure that someday we'll be able to share our creative talents together and help cultivate talents and abilities of others around us. Right now, we are in HUGE debt from all of our borrowing practices and expensive real estate that we continue to buy, so we really have to get back to work so that we can pay for it all. We have a 'Twelve Tribes' to establish, you know! Only two more candles to go!! Make sure that you pray for rich people to come in and give up their lives, so that we can keep this level of lifestyle going. We need to keep having BIG expensive festivals to prove to everybody that we're God's people. How do you expect people with lots of money to come in if we're living in funky-looking earth-friendly dwelling structures on the outskirts of town; growing our own food, anyway? We need the high dollar 'Home Depot' model house look, or wealthy people won't think that we're legitimate."
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>It seems to me there has been much more emphasis put on being a "twelve tribe nation" than there is on being a "light to the Nations", as Isa49:6 says. As far as I can see, it says that it is a "small thing" to become a bonafide nation.
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>If there is too much fuel and not enough oxygen to an engine in a car, it will work for a while. But rest assured, the engine eventually will get gummed-up, and will require more and more fuel to do the same work that it did before. The correct stochiometric balance of oxygen is needed with the fuel. You can't see it, but without it being added in the right amount, things will eventually quit working right.
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>Sometimes the creative side of people can't be readily seen. We see them functioning in a certain realm, and that then becomes who they are...day in and day out. Things to them start to become dull and full of rote. People ask, "How are you doing?" "Just fine" is the reply, because that keeps things simple for them and doesn't complicate their life anymore than what it has to be. That person, though, can't help but feel that their "wings" have been "clipped"...that they've been "assimilated".
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>I'm here to say that, "I need 'oxygen' to go with my 'fuel'!" I need to do things that make sense, and are tangible in my world. All of this religiousness reminds me too much of what I went through during my childhood "Christian" days. Being a member of the Twelve Tribes means that day after day, people have to suffer through standing for long periods of time. Raising hands for the men is mandatory when everybody prays together (that is, if they want to stay "connected"). Morning and evening, day after day, people stand in their same place, listen to the same people practice giving long-winded "mini-sermons", the same musicians play the same old songs. This, of course, "proves" that everybody's in unity.
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>What does it really mean when the Creator says that He wants obedience rather than sacrifice? Could obedience include, how quick a people move into something when it's revealed to them? What if a community just decides to keep doing the same old thing? When does it become religious rote and they're just going through the motions?
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>What happened to the ideas of: weekly feet washing together, non-polluting cottage industries where we all can stay close to home and support other communities, eliminating fried and overcooked foods/cooked oils, eating more and more a live food diet, musical instrument lessons, art lessons, sculpture/building lessons, weekly nature learning expeditions, weekly farming and sprouting classes and morning stretches/exercise together?
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>It puzzles me why there is such a large amount of borrowing and incredibly high-priced downtown real estate purchased - that then dictates how much each community has to make each week to chip away at the debt to pay it all back? Doesn't this send the Twelve Tribes completely off the biblical coarse of living the simple farming-type life style with each other.being content with the high quality basics? By taking on this challenge, the Twelve Tribes would demonstrate what it really means to be a true light to the Nations, and at the same time, how to walk more softly on the earth...
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>What is to be done, instead of consuming more and more non-renewable resources, just to meet the basic survival needs of food, water, shelter and clothing? What is the quality level of these items received? There could then be shown daily to the world a true distinctness to biblical community life on many different facets, not just a few.i.e. the dwelling structures that are lived in, the food that is eaten, how the food and water are prepared, the clothes that are worn, how traveling is accomplished, the way that heavy objects are moved and things are built, and how energy is created and utilized.


(Continue to part 2)
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