I have been thinking a lot in the past weeks as to how I could not see through the madness of my covert cult: The science of identity.
And a narcissistic, germaphobic, rather abusive guru (chris butler).
How did a person like myself who has had such high BS detector end up in such setting. To put up with so much fear and coertion?
How could so many Iskcon devotees be misled by the wolves in saffron robes?
Were we all fools? Was it solely the power of brainwashing?
I kept blaming myself for not seeing through it all. For staying for way too long...
But then I realized that what made me blind was the power of illusion.
No guru has the pwoer to mislead so many without being backed up by Maya.
How can people still worship beings who are so imperfect? Who abuse them in the name of love and devotionL
Cults are not just filled with low self loathing, broken souls. They also attract smart, self confident, balanced people.
Yet they all get trapped and hypnotized by these parasites who pose as great teachers.
In Krishna consciousness we are at war with Maya (the external energy of Krishna).
The guru is supposed to be the one who shows you the ways of Illusion. How illusion separates you from God...
But the sad thing is that most gurus are themselves blinded by illusion.
The followers are also blinded by illusion because they cannot see that their guru is the one eyed man.
The say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. In the case of worshipping rascal gurus, ugliness cannot be seen by the blind.
I feel truly sorry for those who are covered by this thick and powerful force that we call Maya (illusion).
I know pretty well how it operates. I myself have been fooled by that illusory energy more than once. The war against illusion is ongoing.
Illusion is not such a bad thing over all. It is what makes it so that so many followers (not just krishna devotees) still feel bliss worshipping despicable gurus.
It is that same power that makes it so one feels happiness when they give away their mind, life, power away to others.
Once illusion lost its power over me, I understood that without having its thick veil cover my eyes, it is not so easy to roam this reality.
I sometimes miss the days when I believed in all the sweet vedic myths and when I was convinced that my OCD guru held the transcendental ticket to the spiritual skies.
How amazing it was to think that my narcissistic guru was the modern version of Jesus.
What would happen if those poor thousands of devotees realized they have been fooled by all those counterfeit lords and master?
How would they stand seeing the ugly truth?
That everything they feel, see, think is powered by illusion?
What is the power of illusion? It is the force that lures one in and keeps them in that prison by putting pepper spray in their spiritual eyes.
I thank my lunatic guru as well as the krishna consciousness for red pilling me to some extent.
It was a good start and I do not regret the years spent in that semi hell, semi heaven state.
But unfortunately I red pilled myself much more and landed in a dimension where fake gurus, mythology and bliss have lost their charms.
I no longer blame myself for getting fooled by the greatest puppet master: Illusion aka Maya.
I respect her power from afar and thank her for the fake bliss, fake love, fake relations that made the game more bearable.
I embrace the true pain of knowing that it was all a trip.
I watch in sadness my prison mates think that it is normal that the pure medium of god on earth (the self proclaimed guru of the world), fines his free slaves 50 dollars for serving him salty dishes.
I can no longer judge them or question their sanity. I know that they are put under the spell of illusion.
I will never question anyone who gets trapped in cults. Be iT Mooji, Nityananda, Vishwananda, Sai Baba...
Illusion sends different souls to different hells or Nirvana.
Thankfully the whole process is one big fairytale. The Krishna lala land and the Krishna book that we read every night to put us to sleep.
I will always miss that sweet world and the power of belief that made it sound so real.
After all if I were FORCED to adhere to one mythos, I would still pick the krishna program. It is the best of the worse.
Sweet dreams my friends!