BEWARE - Real Love (False Coaching leading to Mormonism)[/b]
Link brings up some very pertinent points about RealLove. Since it stopped in the UK about a year ago, it seems to have gone somewhat underground. RealLove Europe is run by Greg Baer’s favourite nude adult baby, whom he approves and fetes. But RL Europe is not widely publicised and appears to be more underground and virtually non-existent. Maybe that has stopped too, if not, then its actively maintaining a network of all the former RealLovers who were abandoned by Pete and Nikki Uglow last year when they gave up RL. All these adult babies obviously had nowhere to go anymore – no one to phone daily, no one to lay in the arms of and pretend to be a baby, no one to go to group with and tell truths to, no wise people to speak to – and so on. They were all left very suddenly out in the cold without their daddy. It seems a sort-of “RL 12-month Program” took place to de-program people from their total dependence on the UK RL daddies and mummies, groups etc. And RL Europe was a response to all this – and one can only assume is for those who were already daddified and mummified by RL and had been ‘taken’ by it all. Those who had not quite swallowed all the RL Kool-Aid were rejected, as were those that began to question the whole idea of just stopping it all at a point when there was so much reliance on RL for every decision in life and when so much money had been invested. (Link makes this very clear in their experience of RL).

If RL Europe is a little secret support group for those who could not let go and had swallowed all the Kool-Aid, then good luck to them. But Link makes some interesting observations that show us the RL is not completely dead, gone and buried from the UK. We can see that this is so by the fact of what the former daddies and mummies are now doing. Daddy Pete and Mummy Nikki (Uglow) decided to do a ….. surprise, surprise… coaching business. Whether this is fully operational who knows. It was to be focused on infidelity, marital cheating etc. And if anyone should know about this, it would be these two. Their ‘take’ would clearly and deceptively introduce elements of RealLove very cleverly into their work by using Greg Baer’s original book and that of victimhood and wise people. Daddy Ben (Leppier) has focused his attention on coaching the soon to be married and the newly marrieds by offering coaching on ‘how to be married’ before they marry, and then (after the honeymoon) to coach them on how to do married life for the first few months. Ben has clearly chosen to be led by the Greg Baer RL book on marriage, and probably a portion of the dating book too. Mummy Tara seems to be focusing coaching from the business perspective, so probably using Greg Baer’s RL in the workplace as her focus. Not sure what they are all doing, but clearly RealLove is not completely dead and buried – annoyingly and sadly. Pity the poor people who go to these coaches for genuine professional coaching and end up being sent to the US to sit on daddy Greg’s lap and lie prostrate like a baby on his lap and tell him “I Love you daddy”. Pity the people who think and believe that they will get bona fide coaching from these and the others when their focus is just on keeping the RL Cult alive and kicking by a different, less open and obvious means.

It would seem that despite RealLove being exposed as a destructive CULT group that one would continue to promote that they are connected. Maybe they are not using the RL techniques of mind control, but surely once you know you’ve been duped and were involved in a cult surely you’d remove your RL ‘credentials’? When folks blatantly leave in or promote their RL certification this leaves me in no doubt that their beliefs are still enshrined within the ideology. Thus I would say to anyone seeking coaching of any kind to – BEWARE. I know there are folks on this forum who have had rather negative experiences with medical professionals, but this does not mean that whole genres of care should be thrown out because of certain individuals who let you down. We are always far safer in the hands of trained therapists who are regularly scrutinised, their skills regularly updated, they are observed at work to ensure standards, they have membership of ethical organisations and their qualifications are not handed out from self-made ideologists who make up their own unrecognised psychological conditions without having had any authentic training or experience. One great thing that RealLove has inadvertently taught me is to be a lot more wary than I was – and I was wary!!! To check things out and certainly, to source information from forums such as this one, and those in the UK, who have massive amounts of information on the covert activities of these types of organisations. If I had done more checking instead of blindly trusting and believing then I would not have allowed myself to become as involved. I was nowhere near involved as most of the others, but so glad that I woke up and smelled the deception in time enough before I had sold my soul to the devil and become like many of the others still attached to RL and who are not their true self anymore. Lost souls, detached from reality but believing that RL has saved them. The real person still exists alongside the cult person that has been created by RL, but it keeps getting pushed aside.
As with Mormonism – which is Real Love’s primary aim (to mormonise everyone) – they have allowed their thinking to be done for them. There are many parallels between Mormonism and Real Love that cannot be ignored. Greg Baer based the whole program, the cult of RealLove, entirely on the Mormon ways. It’s on every page of every book and in every talk he ever gave – but without it being obvious to the entranced. Only Mormons promote the idea of there being three choices in life, particularly relationships. The two we all know of and make our choices by:

1. Love the situation or circumstances (or person) and remain in that state
2. Dislike the situation or circumstances (or person) and leave that state.

And the third Mormon option which is most favoured in almost every situation (including marital violence, child abuse, paedophilia, etc.) and promoted by mormon clergy. And that is:

3. Dislike or hate the situation or circumstances (or person) and remain in that state

The third situation stunts life and spiritual growth and causes much unhappiness at a deep soul level. There are many people who are now part of Mormonism and stuck in it as much as they are stuck in their belief of RL, and as much as they are unable to comprehend their life circumstances and do anything about it. And all because, like Link has said, they just wanted some simple life coaching to help with a simple easily rectifiable situation in their life. And now their lives are utterly destroyed – whether they know or recognise it, or are avoiding coming to that realisation. Many who don’t comprehend what they have done, don’t manage to get out like Link did, and instead remain stuck in the RL/Coaching/Mormon system while their families, children, relative and friends are at a complete loss to do anything to help them see the light. Like Link has intimated, there comes a point when no one wants to come near to you or talk to you, because all you do is spout RealLove tripe and Mormon rubbish without even realising what you are doing and saying – and everyone gets bored of it to the point of leaving you alone. Leaving you alone to wallow in what they think is your own choice, when in fact it’s been the mind-control and the fact that your true self has been forced to step aside (almost shut down and ceasing to be) while the cult-identity takes over. When no one wants to be near you anymore that is when you are left to the will of the RL and Mormon to finish off what they started.

As with Mormonism, RealLove does not want to give up because it believes it is the one and only true way – the saviour of us all blablabla. And this is one reason why the Mormon mummies and daddies (aka coaches) revert to find new ways of keeping the workings of RL going despite it closing down. So beware anyone who goes to receive coaching in:
Dating
Marriage
Family
Parenting
Workplace
Victimhood
Mental health issues
Because all these are areas that Greg Baer has written books on and founded his RL Cult group on. These areas being separated into individual streams of coaching by the now individual coaches operating on their own steam remain hell bent on basing their work on the principles of RealLove and Mormonism. They will cleverly use material from Greg’s books and ideologies, and before long will also bring up the idea that they will ‘need’ to go see Greg in the US and get held by him etc… Then they will be invited to join whatever ‘secret’ and ‘closed’ groups are going on (social media and literally) so that the whole mind-control process takes hold and they eventually become a Mormon and do whatever they are told to do, say etc. (Drinking the Kool-Aid in RealLove is the name of the game). If you are looking for coaching and find RealLove mentioned time and again then you’ll realise from this site to stay clear. From the thread on LGAT’s on this Forum I copy and paste some recommendations to look for when seeking genuine bona fide coaching. But BEWARE also, because Greg’s work and doings has inspired others to copy him and while they may be doing so on a much smaller scale, they are still using techniques and practices, ideologies and beliefs that are built upon dependence and upon doing psychological work way beyond their level of ability and knowledge. I recall seeing daddy Ben being so out of his depth on one particular occasion, that he had no idea what to say or do. Any Psychological work done in ignorance and in the wrong hands can do irreparable damage. My recommendation (from experience) is to keep trying different people and styles until you find what works for you and don’t settle for what does not feel right. But also bear in mind that in order to heal that someone has to dig out the pain and get in deep, and very often we fight this and make of the other as being in the wrong. Genuine health professionals will not push things if you don’t want it, they will only intervene if your life or those of others’ is in danger. They will never guilt-trip you and make you feel worse than what you are already, and they will never get you to destroy all you familial relationships unless they are dangerous to you or you to them – and if they do it is always stated as a temporary thing to all parties concerned. One of the things with RealLove is that everyone in has had to leave or divorce their partner, avoid family and children, have nothing to do with friends and workmates etc. and to only engage with RL people. The ideal is set with Greg and his perfectly loving family (puke) and of the Uglow’s and various coaches who all have wonderful perfect loving families to aspire towards. Seems the ONLY ones that did not have to distance all their family and loved ones are those at the top of RL and the coaches. You cannot rip peoples’ lives apart like this with the false idea that it’s all going to be wonderful and perfect just like it’s shown by Greg and his self-certified coaches. None of them went through the full process of RL and had to do what followers of RL have to do to be a follower. None of them. Do not believe the false ideals that are spouted to you. RealLove is most definitely NOT a coaching program by any stretch of the mind – if it was it would look a lot more like this….

Making Coaching a Professional Discipline Instead of Snake Oil
Corboy suggests that a healthy discipline
is based on principles rather than personalities. What are the results? Can the results be replicated by others and in different settings? Are the results better than average? Are the benefits greater than current modalities?

A healthy discipline outgrows its founders. A healthy discipline continues to make progress in the absence of charismatic personalities because its researchers use sound research protocol.

* Has a professional code of ethics

* Will not use material obtained by unethical means

* Will conduct its research according to ethical guidelines protecting human subjects and safeguarding confidentiality and informed consent (eg APA guidelines)

a) Has a standard of care -- and sets itself apart from shoddy practitioners
b) Is called elitist by shoddy practitioners

* Does not automatically stifle reports of malpractice on grounds that criticism will ruin the discipline. Open societies are capable of self critique.

* Full disclosure of source material and concepts

* Has a process for training, accreditation of training programs, and a procedure for examining and
licensing practitioners

** Requires training in scientific method and research design so that practitioners know the difference
between methods that are personality driven vs methods derived from testable hypotheses and which have
results better than average and have been replicated in a variety of settings by different researchers

* Welcomes legal accountability. Cannot legally practice professionally or supervise trainees unless
license is tied to state or national disciplinary board.

* Can agree on defining terms so that discipline has a shared professional vocabulary that can be used
in publications and presentations

* Can agree and use research design methods (creating testable hypotheses, taking precautions against
confirmation bias, knowing how to use and interpret statistics

* Uses methods and theories and findings from other disciplines (psychometrics, clinical psychology,
psychiatry, biological psychology, sociology, anthropology, game theory, etc)

* Scholars and practitioners from other disciplines participate in conference and co author articles s

* Different viewpoints

* Discussions of different viewpoints take place publicly - articles, books, conferences, journals

* There are persons and teams pursuing different approaches.

* Publishes a journal that is peer reviewed. More than one such journal is even better.
Is transparent in business practices, and affiliations, past and present.

Does not engage in practices such as multi-level marketing, and network entrepreneurship.

Is unaffiliated with political parties, religious groups, social identity groups