Re: Uma Inder , Umaa
Date: May 14, 2017 04:11PM
I am sorry Nowthewiser that you dismiss what I say, by dismissing me as a cult follower.
I am not following Uma in the way you describe of yourself. I am no ones follower, rather I engage with different teachers, of different origin and with different teachings.
I have never heard her say that she is Truth herself and I never thought of her as such.
I also never heard her claiming that the changes in my life where hers and not mine. This kind of concept did not arise in my contact with her.
The practice of self-awareness and resulting empowerment of self-responsibility, I have learned long ago with other teachers. This has given me much greater freedom, because by learning that I have the power and ability to chose how I perceive, process and react to what ever is coming at me from the outside (or inside for that matter), I have stopped being a powerless victim of my life’s circumstances, and/ or my own programed conditioning. I have never used self-responsibility as means to blame others and deflect from my own responsibility (like you imply that Uma did), neither have I seen Uma do this. Also have I not seen it used as an excuse/method by Uma to keep someone in an abusive situation.
You don’t know what it is to stand in my place, because I cannot recognize myself in how you describe yourself when you where “following” Uma.
I am sorry that you where “being deeply influenced by someone that you are ultimately trusting to know you better than you do.”
And here lies a difference between my and your relating to Uma. I am not trusting her to know me better that I do, I always listen to my own resonance, my own intuition. That is the only sane and healthy way to allow feedback about something that I may have not been previously aware of, or what I find painful to hear. And again, this I learned way before meeting Uma.
“Sovereignty. That's the word. And I thought I had during the times I spent around Uma, but I was existing in a reality construct that was not actually real.”
Again I cannot relate to this experience during my time with Uma, but I do recall bouts of feeling of Sovereignty when I was young and used the transforming experiences and empowerment I felt by being with my teachers, as a way to feel my self superior and untouchable, which was indeed an illusional bubble, but one of my own creation.
“So, yeah, I dismiss what you say, because you're actually not in your right mind. And it may take you years to see that, and you may not want to, and I guess that's ok though I feel sad for the actual freedom you'll miss.”
I am sad that you felt that you where not in your right mind and you missed actual freedom, at least that is what I conclude from the above quote you project onto me.
I am also getting a deeper sense of who you are, how you related to Uma and what happened with you during your time with her. And even more strongly now, I would recommend you to work it out with her, with a neutral and capable mediator/psychologist (or your own therapist) present.