Re: "Jesus Christians," "Australian cult," Dave McKay
Date: October 25, 2010 04:38AM
*LONG HEARTFELT POST ~FEEL FREE TO SKIP*
If anyone doesn't like my style of writing, I'm sorry but I am speaking from my heart. I don't think PM's using terms like "verbosity" are kind or helpful. Sometimes people need to speak/write to heal. Sometimes the information they want to share includes lengthily copy and paste from the JC site or another source so YES their post might seem long to you but no one is making you read it. You can pass it by.
I try to respect other people’s style and I am making every effort to validate their feelings/hurts/experiences/fears/ideas/concerns because obviously it matters to them. I try not to censor anyone or make them feel like idiots for their style of posting because it could be they don't like my style but are graciously forgiving and accepting that it's just ME and they want to show care as many people posting here have been hurt enough without anyone adding to its but jabbing and poking at them in PM.
I appreciate Malcolm's posts when he goes into detail as he was a member of the JC's for a long time and has MUCH to share that is of value. I'm grateful he takes the time and is willing to share his extraordinary experiences and personal opinions as HE is one person who can speak from living through the cult. THAT type of knowledge will be invaluable to a potential victim of McKay’s cult.
You can also learn so much about a person, sometimes you have misjudged someone and their longer post shows what their heart is really like and you learn why they are hurt/angry/passionate etc. After all, we want to be supportive and assist people in healing and sometimes that includes a little venting or a long story or two. I think people are taking a very brave step forward to share their inner most thoughts and awful experiences and we all have different styles. I am wordy quite often. That's me. I'm also friendly; warm hearted, loving, gentle, compassionate, a good listener and a loyal friend so maybe my wordiness is part of a gregarious personality that has not been destroyed by negative life experiences. I had a period in my life where a tragedy occurred and I was unable to speak for days and actually unable to move without assistance due to the emotional devastation. But I was supported and I was helped to cope and heal with love. I have no hate for the person who caused the loss as they actually wrote a very heartfelt letter and I believe they suffered greatly for their mistake of drinking and driving and killing innocent people, one being my precious little boy. The guilty persons family attended the court case, as did I, and would you believe these people had the courage to embrace me and they were actually sobbing. We all lost. We all suffered. But there was no hate only sorrow and I believe that because of that, I was able to recover and live without hatred in my heart.
Now look at someone like dsm/little rose....lashing out at the world, labeling people as murderers when it's obvious from a suicide letter she publisised that there was no blame to total strangers, being kicked off forum after forum for her rages, believing she is related to the Kennedy family, constantly focusing in crimes in the news and somehow believing she is central to solving huge complex cases, unearthing high level corruptions, unjustly ending up in jail according to her posts, screaming about Waco and Chappaquiddick and imaging herself designing Hillary Clintons wallpaper, imagining conspiracies, still muck gathering to score points with McKay, in serious trouble for her actions against an innocent person...... can you imagine being trapped in a heart like that? Full of hate? I think people would have put up with her and treated her as a damaged soul until she went far too far overboard with her videoes. Even the JC members must have told McKay this woman had to get off their forum before the JC end up in the same legal trouble for allowing serious libel. Yet McKay posts proudly that he still gets emails from her and he is still willing to post her gibberish as he did yesterday. It shows how far his credibility has fallen when he uses someone like her as a source...someone he has frequently labeled as mentally ill but he's still willing to court her so he can publish ugliness about others and keep his own hands clean by pinning her as the source. She doesn't seem to yet grasp that she is going to be held accountable for libel and issues cyber terroristic threats with her videoes while he distances himself and can say he banned her.
Now I see Dave McKay in the same light as her....he has been so rejected and feels a failure and he is filled with hate. People are abandoning him left and right, he's been back benched. Ignored. He is essentially unloved and only tolerated by his own people. That can breed hate. His own mother isn't proud of him. He rejected any kindness I tried to show him, calling it false and insincere when a I tried to explain to him that I loved all people, even those who hurt me because I believe Jesus commands us to. He spat in my face. I've never had that happen frankly and was in shock but it opened my eyes to what his members must experience when dealing with a man like that. Can you imagine the pain of having his as a family member...a spouse.....I believe Cherry McKay deserves our love and compassion. I would like if she was not called "consort" or CP30. How do you know she doesn't read this forum and is looking for support and a way out herself? I also believe Kevin McKay deserves our total respect for all he does to speak out against the group and with principles, without malice, he confronts Dave McKay head on weekly, areas where his father has lied, been wrong, unjust, unkind or been UN CHRIST LIKE. Heavens....I don't know if I could speak as firmly against my dad as he has done. I'm not saying this to flatter him...he can't even read this site for some reason (it won't open for him) so I think he rarely knows what is said here but wouldn't it be awesome to have him feel welcome to come here and post? He would have sooooo much to share, like Mal. How about if apostate came here....he would have valuable experiences and inside info to share and Tony too. They lived it all. They survived and would be testimony to others so maybe someone would be saved from joining ANY cult. To me, Kevin McKay is a hero as he could have simply gone away and gone on with his life. I see Mal as a hero for speaking out. I admire Jose David for taking Dave McKay on. Jose was one who got conned into doing whippings and that must have left scars on his soul. I admire young Grace as she must have stood firm of something to make them ship her off. Ash is a hero to me, he went in with great desire to do good and it's not his fault the group was not want he thought it was. He carries on now, standing tall on important issues and fighting for good causes. Brave, giving, selfless people join cults because they are searching for ways to make a difference in the world. Some groups are worse than others....some are easier to leave but there would be a level of loss and a shattering of dreams when people leave as they are losing the kinship of their group and they are often shunned by those who once seemed to be their family. McKay is now practicing these velvet divorces in order to not highlight the number of people dumping him, especially his long term members---those must sting as it amplifies the discord that is obviously going on within the group. Maybe some long term members see Joe Johnson as an extremely immature boy, pettily quarreling with his parents like a teen would.....maybe others just see that the group has become so angry and bitter that time is wasted fighting McKay's phantoms and enemies, rather than saving anyone. I can't imagine what it took for Roland and Sue to leave. It had to be earth shattering to them although the public divorce is made to appear so friendly, anyone can read Dave McKay's jabs at them. They would have suffered having only each other to rely on and a son to raise as well.
I imagine many cult members also feel devastated in a similar way to my own loss-it must feel like deaths to lose "family" you have relied on for 20 years. If any ex members can talk and share, they also can heal. Some leaving cults likely don’t have the family and support system I was blessed to have so forums like this and the ex site offer a safe place to talk. I appreciate the effort it takes to share deep hurts. I sure don't mind reading anyone’s long post if they are willing to put themselves out there and trust me and share. I would not like to censor anyone. You do not know what is going on in their heart and lives and if they have another place to share so why cut someone down for a longer post? Skip reading if you want but I don’t think referring to them as verbose or making them feel badly is kind.
I've even experienced unkind people taking my personal comments and using them to be hurtful but I have also experienced far greater support and love than I could have ever imagined from internet friends from this site and the ex JC site. I’ve decided I can cope with the few vicious people I encounter because they are the abnormal ones and it’s THEIR style to be malicious. I won’t change them and I won’t let them change me and make me like them or make me afraid to share. Dave McKay has mocked me for my "love, flattery, cuddles and cookies" but I don't care....if that is the worst crime I have committed.....good. I will stand up against his record any day. Had I not been honest and share openly I would have missed those peoples chance to love me. So what if Dave McKay and people like little rose take some pokes at me...they attack the world and are malicious unloving jealous people who alienate many many people, including their own families. Their records stand for all to see on the internet, so much HATE! So many enemies so really what they say about us does hurt sometimes but you can put it into context when you consider that it's THEM not you because you've seen their patterns.
I can understand people resenting long posts and labeling them verbose or diatribes if someone is being vicious, cruel and malicious but when I post, although I am PEEVED with McKay and don't "like" him, I don't think I am overly horrid. It hurts me to think I am unwelcome to be myself here as I would like to be able to share honestly with the goal of helping others to see the damage a cult can do to a person’s heart and soul, even via internet and forums.
That's my goal. To keep people from joining the cult as I don't like how McKay treats people and I don't think it's a healthy place for people. I think it's oppressive and a personality driven cult to glorify MCKAY and not JESUS.
So please accept me as I am as I accept you. Please embrace and respect all who post as that will give others the courage to come forward and post. I'd LOVE to see more ex members posting here and I hope they would be embraced regardless of their style. Take what you can from others posts and ignore what you don't want to bother with and if that means simply skim reading a post or skipping it, fine but you need not tell the person. If you were having a face to face discussion with someone you would not tell them to shut up as they talk too much to suit you. That would be unheard of.
I can simply choose to skip a post if I feel it's too long or goes into aspects that I am not interested in.
Please let’s be kind and respectful of others and not try to pick faults on trivial issues.
Yup… VERY VERY long again…so feel free to ignore me but please don't feel the need to invalidate me for my style I am writing from my heart and I have strong feelings as I share. Let's celebrate diversity and embrace anyone who cares enough to open their hearts and share. ;)